Shaming or shame

Yesterday I read a report about a Nurse Shamed by Cashier for Her Rainbow Hair. I work in a college town and not surprises or bothers me. But I don't share the author's view that the nurse's response (below) was somehow wonderful or touching.

“I can’t recall a time that my hair color has prevented me from providing lifesaving treatment to one of my patients. My tattoos have never kept them from holding my hand...as they lay frightened and crying because Alzheimer’s has stolen their mind. My multiple ear piercings have never interfered with me hearing them reminisce about their better days or listening to them as they express their last wishes. My tongue piercing has never kept me from speaking words of encouragement to a newly diagnosed patient or from comforting a family that is grieving.”

As I thought about it, I believe the following response would be just as wonderful and touching:

“I can’t recall a time that my hair color has promoted my providing lifesaving treatment to one of my patients. My tattoos have never pressed them to hold my hand...as they lay frightened and crying because Alzheimer’s has stolen their mind. My multiple ear piercings have never promoted my hearing them reminisce about their better days or listening to them as they express their last wishes. My tongue piercing has never compelled me to speak words of encouragement to a newly diagnosed patient or to comfort a family that is grieving.”

Fact is, what she can't recall and doesn't know cannot serve as proof that no patient has been offended by her hair, tattoos or piercings. She may be a wonderfully competent nurse who does a great job, but she might be able to do a great job without these things as well. If I were in bad shape, I wouldn't be worried about what the nurse who was taking care of my health looked like. That isn't proof that it won't bother someone else.