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Monday, July 28, 2014

Simple thoughts

Which came first, the "Doctor" or the "Doctor's Degree"?

It is well that God can speak through an ass, else He would have little use for many preachers.

If baptism is commanded and only immersion is baptism, then immersion (only) is commanded.

Death is not preventable.

Sunday, July 27, 2014

The 10 Commandments

With apologies to my legal and political friends (but this is funny, no matter who you are):

The real reason that we can’t have the Ten Commandments posted in a courthouse is this — 

You cannot post Thou Shalt Not Steal, Thou Shalt Not Commit Adultery, and Thou Shall Not Lie in a building full of lawyers, judges and politicians. It creates a hostile work environment!

[Often attributed to George Carlin and sometimes to Larry the Cable Guy, but evidently not actually by either of them.]

Saturday, July 26, 2014

Back to the land of Linkin

The posting of links does not constitute an endorsement of the sites linked, and not necessarily even agreement with the specific posts linked.

* A new low for liberals: Attacking Catholic nuns over Hobby Lobby -- "Normally, one would expect an organization that considers itself the pre-eminent defender of women's choices to, you know, defend the free choice of a group of women."
* Bert and Ernie gay marriage cake refused by Northern Ireland bakery -- "A Northern Ireland bakery run by devout Christians could face legal action after it refused to make a gay-themed cake depicting the Sesame Street couple Bert and Ernie."
* Christian bookstores are the next gay-marriage battleground -- "If you think all Christian publishers reflexively oppose same-sex marriage, you are very, very wrong."
* Harry Reid’s Silly Ploy to Fight the Hobby Lobby Ruling -- "More than a week has gone by since the Supreme Court issued its 5-4 decision on Hobby Lobby et al, but the hysterical reaction to it has continued and amplified, especially on Capitol Hill."
* Miracle baby survives miscarriage AND abortion pill to be born healthy -- "Michelle Hui had been pregnant with twins and miscarried, but Megan, now 18 weeks old, miraculously survived."
* Rubio: Same-sex marriage foes face 'intolerance' -- "...he said he could not support such marriages despite a quick-moving shift in public opinion on allowing same-sex couples to marry."
* Why doesn't Brad preach verse by verse through the Bible? -- "From time to time people will ask me why I don’t preach verse by verse through books of the Bible."


* This Couple Spends Their Free Time Mocking Abortion Protesters -- "The blog was created back in March, and has grown in popularity with Tumblr users who think abortion is funny, garnering hundreds of Tumblr shares on certain posts."

I understand the concept of using humor to get one's point across. But to write about "Tumblr users who think abortion is funny" is hopefully a misstatement. I wouldn't think people who are either for or against abortion think it is funny.

Friday, July 25, 2014

10 Things I Hate About American Mission Projects


10. You act as if the American church is the true trend setter for how we should all do church.
9. You’re so concerned over the evil spirits ruling our land when so much evil breeds in your own backyard.
8. You live so far above our average standard of living and you behave as if you’re still in North America.
7. You conclude that you’re communicating effectively because we’re paying attention when we’re actually just intrigued by watching your foreign behavior.
6. You’re obsessed with picture-taking and making videos during our evangelistic programs. It’s really quite embarrassing for us.
5. You underestimate the effectiveness of our local church leaders.
4. You talk about us to your churches back home in such demeaning ways.
3. You too quickly get into the action without thinking through the implications on our churches long after you go home.
2. You call us backward for having little regard for your music, no palates for your green salads, no IQ’s for your advanced technology, and the list goes on.
1. You came to our country because some missions speaker gave you a guilt trip about giving your life to missions.

Thursday, July 24, 2014

I haven't moved

An elderly couple was moseying down a country road in their old pickup truck. A young couple in a shiny new pickup passed them from the other direction. The young man was driving and the young lady was sitting right up next to him, as close as she could get. He had his left hand on the steering wheel and his right arm around her shoulder. As they passed, the elderly lady looked at her husband and said, "Look at that! Remember when we used to travel like that?" He turned toward her and slowly replied, "I haven't moved."

Wednesday, July 09, 2014

Not my Boss's Business

Yesterday on the news I saw a protester holding a sign that read:

Birth Control -- Not My Boss's Business

That sounds logical, but...

My thought is that you are making it their business by asking them to pay for it. Perhaps it would be better to get back to the simplicity of "the boss" paying the salary and then the employee doing what he or she wants with their money.

Tuesday, July 08, 2014

Definitions

Embalmer: the last person you want to meet

"Experience: that most brutal of teachers. But you learn, my God do you learn." -- C.S. Lewis


Abasement: where the furnace is located

Tomorrow: the best time to do the things you had planned for today

"Atheism: a non-prophet organization" -- George Carlin

Professor: one who talks in someone else's sleep

Miser: a man who lives poor in order to die rich


Sunday, July 06, 2014

Sandy Valley news: Never say never

Tragedy struck a hard blow in the Sandy Valley community this week. Suffering from a series of health issues that had become unbearably painful, Uncle John Craneman ended his life with a single shotgun blast to the head. The way he carried it out in death was as ingenious as his many unique inventions in life.

Reverend Peacock performed the sad eulogy. Forcefully he stressed the grace of God in salvation while some listeners secretly wondered whether a man who took his life could go to heaven. 

Elder Poden Tate, Uncle John's brother-in-law, didn't worry about that as his mind wandered to an ironic incident of years past. Some ten years ago Poden and John had attended the shape note singing convention together in Mineral Falls. As men were wont to do, at dinner-time several of them gathered to chew to fat and spread the news. One pressing piece of news was of a man some of them knew, who had committed suicide. Each shared his opinion on the matter. Uncle John added incredulously, "That'll be the last thing I'll ever do."

...And it was.