Yelling at me for barking.. I'M A DOG, YOU NUMBSKULL!
Taking me for a walk, then not letting me check stuff out. Exactly whose walk is this anyway?
Any trick that involves balancing food on my nose... Stop it!
Any haircut that involves bows or ribbons. Now you know why we chew your stuff up when you're not home.
The sleight of hand, fake fetch throw. You fooled a dog! Woooo-Hooooooo! Oh, what a proud moment for the top of the food chain.
Dog sweaters. Hello??? Haven't you noticed the fur?
-- Excerpts from an e-mail from Chuck at saltandlight@comcast, 25 December 2006