Based on a true story (the Hollywood definition) -- There is a true story. We didn't tell it.
Cigarette -- A pinch of tobacco rolled in paper with fire at one end and a fool on the other
Etc. -- A sign to make others believe that you know more than you actually do
Lecture -- An art of transferring information from the notes of the lecturer to the notes of the students without passing through the minds of either
Predetonation -- How Calvinists set off their fireworks
Suicide -- A permanent reaction to a temporary problem
Worshiptainment -- entertainment substituted for and claimed as some sort of spiritual experience