The exception clause

I have had this in the queue for quite some time, seemingly unable to finish it. However, I am going to post it unfinished!

Matthew 5:31-32
It hath been said, Whosoever shall put away his wife, let him give her a writing of divorcement: But I say unto you, That whosoever shall put away his wife, saving for the cause of fornication , causeth her to commit adultery: and whosoever shall marry her that is divorced committeth adultery.

Matthew 19:8-9
He saith unto them, Moses because of the hardness of your hearts suffered you to put away your wives: but from the beginning it was not so. And I say unto you, Whosoever shall put away his wife, except it be for fornication, and shall marry another, committeth adultery: and whoso marrieth her which is put away doth commit adultery.

“The exception clause” is a phrase used to name or describe Jesus’s statements in Matthew 5:32 and 19:9 about marriage, divorce (putting away), and adultery – “saving for the cause of fornication” / “except it be for fornication.”

Got Questions Ministries explains it this way:

“The meaning of Matthew 5:32 and 19:9 is clear. If a person gets a divorce and then remarries, it is considered adultery unless the exception clause is in effect.”

Despite their absolute assurance, it not that “clear” to all interpreters. The passage engenders much discussion and debate. For example, does “the exception clause” provide an exception for allowing remarriage after a divorce, or does it provide an exception for not calling the putting away adultery?[i] David Janzen’s assessment is more accurate than that of Got Questions.

“It is likely that not a truer word has been written in the field of biblical studies than Ben Witherington’s observation that nearly everything about the two Matthean divorce exception clauses is disputed.”[ii]

There are related passages in Mark 10:10-12 and Luke 16:18 to consider, but they do not specifically address the exception clause.[iii]

Random notes and comments on the exception clause

Verses and words

Jesus is not giving a new teaching about divorce; rather he is restating God’s original design and intent. See Matthew 19:4-6.

Words for further research. Matthew 5:32 (fornication, πορνειας; adultery, μοιχευθηναι, μοιχαται); Matthew 19:9 (fornication, πορνεια; adultery, μοιχευθηναι, μοιχαται); Mark 10:11-12 (adultery, μοιχαται); Luke 16:18 (adultery, μοιχευει). Adultery (moichao), to have unlawful intercourse with another’s spouse. Fornication (porneia), illicit sexual intercourse; adultery, bestiality, fornication, homosexuality, etc.

Matthew 5:32; 19:9. A man would not cause his wife to be an adulteress through divorce, if she were already an adulteress through fornication.

Both Matthew and Mark refer to Herodias as “Philip’s wife,” even though she had divorced Philip and married Herod (Matthew 14:3-4; Mark 6:17-18).

Jesus tells the Samaritan woman at the well “thou hast had five husbands” and “he whom thou now hast is not thy husband” (John 4:16-18). Various inferences have been drawn from this, despite the text not indicating whether she had five husbands lawfully (one after another had died, etc.), whether she had been divorced from every one of them, or some combination of both possibilities.

Baptists in England

Second London Baptist Confession

Baptists of London adapted the Westminster Confession to use in their own Second London Confession of 1689. The changes they made can provide some insights into their thinking. When these brethren built their statement on marriage, they removed the paragraph in the Westminster permitting divorce and remarriage. Westminster’s Article 24, paragraph 5 states:

Adultery or fornication committed after a contract, being detected before marriage, gives just occasion to the innocent party to dissolve that contract. In case of adultery after marriage, it is lawful for the innocent party to sue out a divorce, and after the divorce to marry another, as if the offending party were dead.

The Westminster Confession of Faith Chapter 24 is titled, “Of Marriage and Divorce.” It has four paragraphs on marriage and two on divorce. The Second London Baptist Confession Chapter 25 is titled “Of Marriage.” It omits paragraphs four & five on divorce.

John Gill, on Matthew 5:32

…she must be guilty of adultery; since she is his proper wife, the bond of marriage not being dissolved by such a divorce: and

whosoever shall marry her that is divorced, committeth adultery; because the divorced woman he marries, and takes to his bed; is legally the wife of another man…

Early years of church history

William Heth and Gordon Wenham extensively researched the marriage theology of early Christian writers. They summarize their research of the views of divorce and remarriage this way:

“In the first five centuries (among Christians) all Greek writers and all Latin writers except one agree that remarriage following divorce for any reason is adulterous. The marriage bond was seen to unite both parties until the death of one of them.”[iv]

Before and after salvation

Some who take a strict view on divorce and remarriage (and perhaps some who don’t) believe that the New Testament teaching on the subject of divorce and remarriage is null regarding anything that happened during a marriage before one became a Christian. In his book on Divorce and Remarriage, Andrew Cornes addresses this:

Most important of all, it assumes that it is the sin (of divorce) which prevents remarriage. If this sin can be removed, by forgiveness, then no barrier to remarriage remains. This view is so obviously flawed that it is amazing how tenacious it is. If sin is really the barrier, what does the time of conversion to Christ have to do with it? Surely sin committed after conversion can be fully forgiven and removed?...Jesus does not base his prohibition of remarriage on the sin of divorce. He bases it on the fact that remarriage would be legalized adultery. In other words, he bases it on the fact that the marriage bond continues to exist despite the divorce. It is not the (sin of) divorce which makes remarriage impossible for the Christian; it is the (original) marriage. Only death dissolves the marriage bond, and therefore only death sets a person free to remarry”[v]

A marriage pandemic

One claim is that Jesus’s statement allows for remarriage when the reason for the divorce is adultery. Even if this is a correct interpretation, surely we can agree that what was a small moth hole of “exception” has become a gaping gash in the marriage fabric of modern American Christianity! First one exception, then another, then many more. “No-fault divorce” is a plague of pandemic proportions.

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[i] Perhaps the main views fall into three broad groups. (1) Neither divorce nor remarriage is allowed. πορνεια refers to the annulment of incestuous marriages of pagan converts, or refers to the sexual violation in the Jewish betrothal period. (2) Divorce is allowed in cases of πορνεια, but remarriage is forbidden. (3) Divorce and remarriage are allowed, but only in cases of πορνεια.
[ii] “The Meaning of Porneia in Matthew 5.32 and 19.9: an Approach From the Study of Ancient Near Eastern Culture,” David Janzen, Journal for the Study of the New Testament, Volume 23, Issue 80, March 1, 2001, pp. 66-80 (Citing Ben Witherington in “Matthew 5:32 and 19:9—Exception or Exceptional Situation?” New Testament Studies, No. 31, 1985, p. 571). There is disagreement on what constitutes the exception; disagreement on what is the reason for the exception; disagreement on the meaning of the word porneia; and on and on. (Consider John 7:17 may have some impact on this problem.)
[iii] Mark 10:10-12, putting away or divorcing a spouse and marrying another is adultery. Luke 16:18, putting away (or divorcing) a wife, or marrying one who has been put away is committing adultery.
[iv] Jesus and Divorce, William Heth, Gordon Wenham, Nashville, TN: Thomas Nelson Publishers, 1984, p. 22.
[v] Divorce and Remarriage: Biblical Principles and Pastoral Practice, Andrew Cornes, Grand Rapids, MI: Eerdmans, 1993 pp. 246-247).

Bethany Baptist, 125 years

On Sunday November 17, 2019, I attended the 125th anniversary of Bethany Baptist Church, Oak Flat, Nacogdoches County, Texas. Bethany was organized in 1894 by Elder S. F. Baucom, with 10 charter members.[i] In 1895, E. D. Blankinship was pastor.[ii] The current pastor is Dale Weir.[iii]

It was the first time in their 125 years and my 60-something years that I have ever been there, though it is about 15 miles drive through the country from my home. The folks were nice and welcoming, and I enjoyed the visit. Songs were sung and prayers were made, but the focus of the afternoon was the history of the church. Jack Whitaker directed the service. Representatives of the Shelby-Doches Baptist Association and the Southern Baptists of Texas Convention made brief talks. Ed Williamson, a former pastor and local resident, presented the history of the church.

Though I have never been to Bethany Church, our family has some intriguing connections to this community, church, and school. Coincidental in terms of topography and titles, we live in Oak Flat also, though in Rusk County.[iv] In 1896, our church, Smyrna Baptist Church in Rusk County, called J. R. Carmichael, “a young, unordained preacher from Bethany Church, Nacogdoches County...Bethany Church was requested to ordain Bro. Carmichael. Meantime, following the scruples of the time, the minutes explicitly stated that Bro. Carmichael was called ‘as supply until he has been ordained and then as our pastor for the next year.’”[v] Brother Carmichael’s wife was Ida Whitaker, who I believe is a relative of Jack Whitaker of Bethany Church, the person in charge of the anniversary program. After Brother Carmichael moved to the Smyrna area, his wife joined Smyrna Church upon an experience of grace for baptism. J. R. Carmichael was a distant relative of the Vaughns and Parkers of Smyrna Church, all being descendants of the large Parker family of Greene and Taliaferro counties in Georgia, who came to East Texas in the 1850s.[vi]

During the pastorate of young J. R. Carmichael (b. 1871), an older cousin, Marshall Lewis Vaughn (my great-grandfather, b. 1858), surrendered to the gospel ministry. He was licensed to preach during this time. When the Sulphur Springs Church called for his ordination, Smyrna ordained him October 17, 1897.[vii] Elders J. R. Carmichael and M. F. Spivey formed the presbytery, perhaps assisted by others whose names are no longer known.[viii]

According to Nacogdoches Baptist Association minutes, in 1906 Vincent Thornton Vaughn, Marshall’s older brother, pastored Bethany Church. In 1910, Marshall Vaughn pastored Bethany Church. When Marshall pastored the church, Robert P. Goldsberry was Bethany’s church clerk. R. P. Goldsberry in 1873 was a charter member of the Smyrna Church in Rusk County, and was a member of the earlier Mt. Carmel Church.[ix]

In the 1911-12 school year, Benjamin Lewis Vaughn, Marshall’s son, taught at the Oak Flat School in Nacogdoches County, which, according to the history presented by Ed Williamson, met in the same building as Bethany Church. As far as I know, this is the only place Uncle Ben taught school. After that school year, he died of typhoid fever on August 21, 1912. Two of his pupils, siblings Ruth and Glen Pearce, wrote a memorial for their teacher – which was published in a newspaper.[x] Sadly, 16-year old Glen died only a month after his teacher. Ruth (Mary Ruth Pearce Davis) died in 1977.

My regular readers may not find much of interest in this personal rambling. Nevertheless, I was impressed with the connections we have with a church to which I have never been before. What is it they say about six degrees of separation?

There is something fascinating about peering into the history of people, places, and institutions.

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[i] According to the program, Bethany was organized at New Harmony and then later moved to Oak Flat. I do not know this first location, other than assuming it was apparently in the Cushing/Linn Flat vicinity.

[ii] “Texas Baptist Statistics - 1895,” East Texas Family Records, Volume 6, Number 2, Summer 1982, p. 9. E. D. Blankinship pastored Smyrna Baptist Church from 1899 to 1901.

[iii] “Bethany Baptist marks 125 years,” The Daily Sentinel, November 14, 2019.

[iv] Apparently, at some time a map-maker or other official dubbed this community “Oak Flats.” Those of us who live here call is Oak Flat, singular. We ought to know. It is our community.

[v] Centennial + 5: History of Smyrna Baptist Church, of Rusk County, Texas, 1873-1978, James Wyatt Griffith, Henderson, TX: Printing, 1978, p. 13.

[vi] J. R. Carmichael was the son of William M. Carmichael and Sarah Ann Brandon, and the grandson of Reuben Carmichael and Sydney Frances Parker.

[vii] Ibid, p. 15. Sulphur Springs is about halfway between Bethany and Smyrna.

[viii] Milton F. Spivey was the son of Harvey Reddick Milton Spivey and Lucinda Catherine Heaslet. The parents are buried in the Walnut Grove Cemetery at Wonders, near Garrison. M. F. Spivey died in 1903, but I do not know where he was buried.

[ix] He was Elder S. F. Baucom’s father-in-law, though by 1910 Goldsberry’s daughter had died and Baucom had remarried. S. F. Baucom was the son of FNU and Francis Baucom. After her husband’s death, Francis Baucom married Edward T. Parker.

[x] Perry Rawlinson of Cushing gave me the clipping that I have. A Cushing or Nacogdoches newspaper probably printed it.

Family Values

All these verses speak of family values in some way or another.

• Genesis 14:13-14 And there came one that had escaped, and told Abram the Hebrew; for he dwelt in the plain of Mamre the Amorite, brother of Eshcol, and brother of Aner: and these were confederate with Abram. And when Abram heard that his brother was taken captive, he armed his trained servants, born in his own house, three hundred and eighteen, and pursued them unto Dan.
• Deuteronomy 6:6-7 And these words, which I command thee this day, shall be in thine heart: 7 and thou shalt teach them diligently unto thy children, and shalt talk of them when thou sittest in thine house, and when thou walkest by the way, and when thou liest down, and when thou risest up.
• Joshua 24:15 ...as for me and my house, we will serve the Lord.
• Job 1:13 And there was a day when his sons and his daughters were eating and drinking wine in their eldest brother’s house:
• Job 42:11 Then came there unto him all his brethren, and all his sisters, and all they that had been of his acquaintance before, and did eat bread with him in his house: and they bemoaned him, and comforted him over all the evil that the Lord had brought upon him: every man also gave him a piece of money, and every one an earring of gold.
• Psalm 68:6 God setteth the solitary in families: he bringeth out those which are bound with chains: but the rebellious dwell in a dry land.
• Psalm 107:41 Yet setteth he the poor on high from affliction, and maketh him families like a flock.
• Psalm 127:1,3-5 Except the Lord build the house, they labour in vain that build it...Lo, children are an heritage of the Lord: and the fruit of the womb is his reward. As arrows are in the hand of a mighty man; so are children of the youth. Happy is the man that hath his quiver full of them: they shall not be ashamed, but they shall speak with the enemies in the gate.
• Psalm 133:1 Behold, how good and how pleasant it is for brethren to dwell together in unity!
• Proverbs 4:3-4 For I was my father’s son, tender and only beloved in the sight of my mother. He taught me also, and said unto me, Let thine heart retain my words: keep my commandments, and live.
• Proverbs 11:29 He that troubleth his own house shall inherit the wind: and the fool shall be servant to the wise of heart.
• Proverbs 12:7 The wicked are overthrown, and are not: but the house of the righteous shall stand.
• Proverbs 17:6 Children’s children are the crown of old men; and the glory of children are their fathers.
• Proverbs 23:22 Hearken unto thy father that begat thee, and despise not thy mother when she is old.
• Proverbs 31:28 Her children arise up, and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praiseth her.
• Mark 7:10-13 For Moses said, Honour thy father and thy mother; and, Whoso curseth father or mother, let him die the death: But ye say, If a man shall say to his father or mother, It is Corban, that is to say, a gift, by whatsoever thou mightest be profited by me; he shall be free. And ye suffer him no more to do ought for his father or his mother; making the word of God of none effect through your tradition, which ye have delivered: and many such like things do ye.
• Luke 1:58 And her neighbours and her cousins heard how the Lord had shewed great mercy upon her; and they rejoiced with her.
• John 2:1-2 And the third day there was a marriage in Cana of Galilee; and the mother of Jesus was there: and both Jesus was called, and his disciples, to the marriage.
• John 11:3-5 Therefore his sisters sent unto him, saying, Lord, behold, he whom thou lovest is sick. When Jesus heard that, he said, This sickness is not unto death, but for the glory of God, that the Son of God might be glorified thereby. Now Jesus loved Martha, and her sister, and Lazarus.
• John 19:26 When Jesus therefore saw his mother, and the disciple standing by, whom he loved, he saith unto his mother, Woman, behold thy son!
• Ephesians 6:2 Honour thy father and mother; (which is the first commandment with promise;)
• 1 Timothy 5:4,8,16 But if any widow have children or nephews, let them learn first to shew piety at home, and to requite their parents: for that is good and acceptable before God...But if any provide not for his own, and specially for those of his own house, he hath denied the faith, and is worse than an infidel...If any man or woman that believeth have widows, let them relieve them...
• 1 John 4:20 If a man say, I love God, and hateth his brother, he is a liar: for he that loveth not his brother whom he hath seen, how can he love God whom he hath not seen?

Edmund Shackelford (or Shackleford)

White Plains Baptist Church at White Plains, Greene County, Georgia, was organized in 1806. On May 29, 1812, my great-great-great-great grandparents Richard and Sally Parker united with this church on experience of grace and were received (minutes, p. 17). They were possibly baptized by Pastor Edmund Shackelford,[i] though the minutes do not state this. Shackelford served White Plains’ second pastor from June 1810 to January 1818. I found the following death notice/obituary for Shackelford in the Milledgeville, Georgia, newspaper Federal Union, Saturday, October 2, 1830, page 3.

At his residence, in Hancock county, on the 1st inst. the Rev. Edmund Shackleford, aged 49 years, two months and 22 days. He died suddenly of a relapse, after the most pleasing hopes had been entertained of his recovery. A feeling community will sympathise with his pious and afflicted widow and his bereaved children. He was received into the Baptist Church at the early age of 18, soon after which, he began to call upon his fellow creatures “to repent and believe the Gospel,” and within a year or two, was ordained to the ministry. He was very successful in winning souls to Christ, and many most pleasing revivals have existed in the various Churches of which he was from time to time the Pastor. In his pulpit exercise, he was zealous, animated, and often eloquent. He entered with zeal into the benevolent schemes of the day; and by his death the Church has not only been shorn of one of her brightest beams but the cause of Temperance has keen bereft of an able and efficient advocate. The writer of this article well remembers that at the last meeting of the Georgia Temperance Society, many tears were shed under his touching appeals. How mysterious is the Providence of God, how “unsearchable are his judgments, and his ways past finding out!” A little before his death, he summoned his family to his bedside, and addressed them in the most feeling manner upon the important concerns of eternity. He held sweet communion with God throughout his illness, except a momentary darkness which overshadowed his mind a few hours before his death; it was however but for a moment, and again he was enabled to rejoice in God. Even after his speech failed, he manifested by his gestures that all was well with his soul, and that he was dying in the glorious hope of a blessed immortality. The infidel may boast of his vain philosophy, and scoff at the religion of Jesus, but there is nothing which can dispel the awful gloom that hangs around the grave—there is nothing which can sustain the soul when flesh and heart foil, and while the world “recedes and disappears,” but the animating hopes to be found in the gospel.—Southern Recorder.

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[i] Biography in Ford’s Christian Repository, Volume 7, p. 288. The January 28, 1829 Augusta Chronicle notes his second marriage in Hancock County, “on Sunday evening the 11th instant, by the Rev. Joseph Roberts, the Rev. Edmund Shackelford, of Morgan county to Mrs. Mary Haygood.”

Wyatt Vaughn

The following genealogical information was written by me, and is taken from page 419 of Rusk County History by the Rusk County Historical Commission. I have made a minor edits with updated information.

Wyatt Vaughn came to Texas before the Civil War. Wyatt came from Greene County, Georgia and settled in Rusk County. He had a half-sister, Rebecca Astin. Wyatt bought land in the Stockman League in October of 1854 from Clinton D. Holleman, and again in February 1860 from James King.[i]

Wyatt Vaughn married Eliza Jane Parker while they lived in Georgia. Wyatt was born January 11, 1820, and Eliza was born February 22, 1829, with daughter of William Parker and Eunice Jane Nelson. Rebecca Astin married Edwin S. Parker, a brother of Eliza. In Georgia (Greene County) they were members of Smyrna (now Siloam) Baptist Church and White Plains Baptist Church.

Eight children were born to Wyatt and Eliza: John W., December 1, 1845; Susan E., March 5, 1851; Vincent Thornton, November 10, 1848; Olenza Burma, June 5, 1851 (all in Georgia); and Nancy Jane, February 24, 1854; William Thomas, May 1, 1856; Marshall Lewis, May 24, 1858; and Jabez C., February 26, 1861 (all in Texas).

Wyatt and his son John joined the Texas State Guards (Company B), and both died of typhoid fever at Galveston (March 28 and March 25, 1864, respectively) during the Civil War. Eliza Vaughn died January 8, 1887 and was buried in the Shiloh Cemetery.

The church was the center of interest for many of the Vaughns. The children of Wyatt and Eliza were active members of the Smyrna Baptist Church in the Oak Flat Community. V. T. and M. L. were ministers, and W. T. (called “Bud”) was a deacon. William W. Vaughn, son of V. T.; Benjamin L., son of M. L.; Raymond R. Scruggs, son of Olenza Vaughn Scruggs; and Roe T. Holleman, son of Nancy Jane Vaughn Holleman, were Baptist ministers. John F. Vaughn, son of W. T., was a deacon at Smyrna. M. L. Vaughn had two grandsons who served as deacons at Smyrna and one grandson who was a Baptist preacher (all now deceased). There are also two living great-grandsons and one great-great grandson of M. L. who are Baptist ministers.

John W. is buried at Galveston. Susan E. married Wylie M. Pierce and is believed to be buried at Shiloh Cemetery in an unmarked grave. V. T. Vaughn is buried at Shiloh. Burma, Jane, W. T., M. L., and Jabez are buried at Holleman Cemetery.

At the time this history was written, the oldest living descendant of Wyatt Vaughn was Simeon Levi Vaughn, son of M. L., and the youngest Vaughn descendant was Zechariah, great-great-grandson of M. L. Vaughn. Uncle Levi has since passed away, and others have been born.

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[i] “Brother Wiatt Vaun” applied for letters of dismission from White Plains Church for himself and Eliza on November 12, 1852. Since he both bought land and had a daughter born in Texas in 1854, we might guess that they lived with relatives until they were able to purchase land and build a home. Vincent Thornton Vaughn was named after Baptist preacher Vincent Thornton.

Family of Vincent Thornton Vaughn

Missing Shirley

Seven years ago Shirley Hunt went missing. We have had no resolution in all that time as to what might have happened.

The use of the voice

"When man was created he was blessed in many ways above other creatures; one blessing in particular was the voice with which to speak, and sing hymns of love and adoration to the Creator. He who uses not the voice given him, deprives himself of much pleasure, and is guilty of the sin of omission. Nothing short of the use of the voice to the fullest extent will suffice." -- "B. L. Vaughn, Singer and Instructor in Vocal Music" (Benjamin Lewis Vaughn, 1885--1912)

4 times to honour your father (and mother)

Ephesians 6:1-3 Children, obey your parents in the Lord: for this is right. Honour thy father and mother; (which is the first commandment with promise;) That it may be well with thee, and thou mayest live long on the earth.
Exodus 20:12 Honour thy father and thy mother: that thy days may be long upon the land which the LORD thy God giveth thee.

First, notice that the Bible defines who are parents. 
"This explains who parents are..." (John Gill) After exhorting children to obey parents, Paul says "Honour thy father and mother." In days when the definition of parents becomes very creative and substandard, we do well to accept this correction and remember the ideal.

Second, let us ask and answer the question "What is honour?"
Most often we associate the verb honour with respect, admiration, high esteem, and even veneration or reverence. These are all on the mark in regard to honouring father and mother. The word entered the English language through the Anglo-French  and Old French from the Latin honos/honorem, meaning esteem, dignity or renown. The Greek time/timao incorporates a similar semantic range and points us to something of value and to fixing the value of something. In his commentary on Matthew 15, John Gill speaks of "high esteem," "respectful language...towards them," "cheerful obedience" and that it includes "honouring them with their substance, feeding, clothing, and supplying them with the necessaries of life, when they stand in need thereof; which is but their reasonable service, for all the care, expense, and trouble they have been at, in bringing them up in the world..." Children are to honour their parents, husbands their wives, churches their widows and their elders, slaves their masters, subjects their kings, any to any to whom honour is due, and creatures should honour their Creator.

Romans 13:7 Render therefore to all their dues: tribute to whom tribute is due; custom to whom custom; fear to whom fear; honour to whom honour.

Next, consider three reasons to honour our fathers and mothers.
1. Because of God's command. Some may think that they are excused from honouring father and mother because "they don't deserve it". No doubt some parents are better parents when compared to other parents. Clearly, some parents may be neglectful, abusive or incompetent. We do not honour these sinful deficiencies, but at some level all parents should receive honour, in whatever small way, simply because they are parents and because it is God's command. Whether or not their actions reflect honour -- we are not responsible for their actions, but our own. We should show honour in our actions toward them -- actions for which we are responsible.
2. Because of God's promise. Paul calls the fifth commandment "the first commandment with promise" because there is a specific promise of blessing associated with it. Initially blessing should be associated with the law and its direct application to the nation of Israel in the land God gave them. But the apostle appropriates the blessing for all obedient children who honor their fathers and mothers. The New Testament application seems to be more on the quality of life than the total number of days, which surely should be the spiritual emphasis.
3. Because it is right. "It is right" directly follows "Children, obey your parents," so we can say obedience is right -- the right thing to do. This is immediately followed with the command to "honour," so it does no damage to understand that "it is right" applies to honour as well as obedience (knowing also that obedience is an expression of that honour). That "it is right" implicates this command to be of a moral nature and is a moral obligation.

Finally, consider 4 periods of time when we should honour our fathers and mothers -- which, in effect, cover the entire period of our lives. We should honour them:
1. In youth, by obedience to them (Deut.21:18; Lev. 19:3). In the period from birth to adulthood children respect, admire, and esteem their parents by obedience to their commands and faithfulness to their instruction. The wise parent understands that through the range of this developmental period the child progresses and should learn and develop responsibility, personal independence, and the ability to make decisions.
2. In our adulthood, by respect for them. As child develops into an adult, changes occur in the nature of the parent/child relationship. But their parents remain parents and honour is still required. Yet that honour takes on new and different expressions.  One of the chief markers of adulthood is marriage. A man "leaves his father and mother and cleaves unto his wife." A new covenant relationship between husband and wife does not sever the parent/child relationship, but it does change it. Obedience of a child required in the home changes to respect of a child shown outside the home. The responsibility to the new husband/wife (and children that will follow) relationship is foremost. Yet these covenanted spouses do not move from "honour thy father and mother" to "dishonour thy father and mother." Rather they must learn how to continue to place value on their parent/child relationship in a new and different way. This can include listening to and heeding their good advice, appreciating them even when the advice is not taken, respecting them even in disagreements, and teaching grandchildren to value of and respect their grandparents.
3. In their old age, by care for them (I Timothy 5:8). When father and mother arrive in old age, the parent/child relationship has come full circle. The parents who gave life to the child, fed and clothed and nurtured it, may now fall into such need themselves through infirmity, illness, and old age. It is "worse than the infidel" to leave parents to fend for themselves. Jesus excoriates those whose pretended religious devotions excused them from parental maintenance -- which he clearly associates with the fifth commandment.  I believe on this count many of us Western Christians stand guilty.
4. After their deaths, by remembering them. Dead parents may yet speak to us, and we may still honour them. We honour them by remembering them fondly, passing on their good instruction, and living up to the words of truth they passed down. In Jeremiah 35 God uses a family faithful to the instructions of their ancestor to shame Israel for refusing to remain faithful to God.

Want to be right, do right, and obey God? Honour your father and mother.

Proverbs 1:8—“My son, hear the instruction of thy father, and forsake not the law of thy mother:”

Readings on "parents vs. society"

The posting of web links does not constitute an endorsement of the sites linked, and not necessarily even agreement with viewpoint of the posts linked.

Domestic Threats to Parental Rights
Faith healing and the law
Lawyers ask court to rule in prayer death
Sick girl removed from hospital
The Injustice of Helpful Parents — Yet More Insanity

Missing 5 years

On the Tuesday after Father's Day, June 19, 2007, my mother-in-law, Shirley Hunt, disappeared. It is now 5 years later and she is still missing. She had Alzheimer's and walked away from her home. We didn't find her, though there was lots of help and extensive searching. We don't really know anything more now than we did then. There is no relief but that God provides. We appreciate all the kind words, kind deeds and prayers that God has given each of you.

Ain't he handsome?

In memory

Susan Delaine Vaughn Milstead, passed away Saturday July 2, 2011. She was the youngest and last surviving child of James Thomas Vaughn and Delanie Jane Whitten.

Missing 3 years

Shirley Hunt has been missing three years. We appreciate all the thoughts, prayers and help of everyone during this period. The Lord knows what happened; we hope someday we will know.

Happy Birthday

....to my little girl.

Congratulations Zach & Rachel

Tonight, June 29, 2009, at Buda, Texas, Zach Vaughn and Rachel Noteboom entered into marriage covenant together. May God bless them with a long and loving relationship.

"Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife." Genesis 3:24

Two years later

On the Tuesday after Father's Day, June 19, 2007, my mother-in-law, Shirley Hunt, went missing. Two years later she is still missing. Family, friends, law enforcement, et al. have done what they could, but we still don't really know anything more than we did then. She had Alzheimer's and walked away from home.

Someone said

Someone said the family is the basic building block of society. Would you agree?

Alzheimer's Walk 2008

The annual Alzheimer's Walk will be October 9th at 5:00 p.m. - 7:30 p.m. at Lake Forest Park, Henderson, Texas.

Schedule of Events:
5:00 p.m.: Registration, free food, Family fun and Entertainment
6:00 p.m.: Walk
7:00 p.m.: Commemorative Candle Lighting

Uncle John Sanders

In Memory of John Sanders
----------------
Who was once a member of the Oak Flat Singing Class, a strong supporter, and also a teacher of Sacred Harp. He has been gone from us for twenty years, having moved west in 1906. Though his works with us still remain. He surely did enjoy singing those sacred songs.

Soon after his death which was February 18, 1926, his dear daughter of 13 years wrote us that she could almost hear him sing:

Jesus lover of my soul,
Let me to Thy bosom fly;
While the raging billows roll,
While the tempest still is high;
Hide me oh, my Savior hide,
'Til the storm of life is past;
Safe into the haven guide
Oh receive my soul at last.

We feel sure that this dear friend and brother has realized an answer to this prayer in song and as he did so frequently sing:

How happy are the souls above
From sin and sorrow free;
With Jesus they are now at rest
And all his glories see.

He is gone but not forgotten. May we follow his example and still sing until we too can join that
heavenly host in singing Hosanna's to the Lamb of God which was and is to come.

So sweet are the memories of his past life in singing and teaching these sacred songs, and how sweet the thought that soon we will meet him in that home over there by the side of the river of life, where the saints all immortal and fair, are robed in their garments of white.

Read and approved September 26, 1926.
Charles Pruitt, Chairman,
M. L. Vaughn,
E. F. Scruggs,
Committee

The above obituary is in a scrapbook belonging to my Mother & Father. It appears to be a memorial that was adopted by the Oak Flat Singing Class (since it references singing but not church). I suppose it was printed in a local newspaper.

Like a child at home

"There would I find my settled rest,
While others go and come,
No more a stranger or a guest,
But like a child at home."

Love it. This portion of a hymn was quoted in the article Baptism-Rebaptism by Gilbert Beebe in 1856. If anyone knows the hymn or its author I would be interested in finding it. Thanks.